Foehammer’s Anvil

Mysteriously my site crashed right around the time this nice fellow named Leonard had these things to say about me on his blog. Coincidence, I’m sure; he hardly seems to possess the brains to be a hacker. Read the love:

Our latest contestant is Foehammer’s Anvil. I know what you’re saying: boy, Mister Leonard Pierce, that name sure does sound like something a guy might come up with who has just spent many hours playing World of Warcraft and masturbating over what he remembers Seven of Nine looks like. And you’re right. But it takes a lot more than a willingness to rock an absurd self-granted tough-guy nickname to roll with the king snakes! Let’s see if he can bring it the way authentic voices of the New Eliminationism can! How does Fudgehammer stack up in the compulsories?

SELF-GRANTED TITLE AS SOLE DISPENSER OF HARSH FACTS ABOUT ISLAMOFASCISM: Check! The subtitle of the blog is “Truth, not Islam”, which makes as much sense as “Cotton candy, not justice”.

LOTS OF FANCY-PANTS QUASI-SOCIALIST-REALIST ARTWORK STOLEN FROM OTHER SOURCES: Check! Get a load of Uncle Sam, there, gesturing just behind us and (naturally!) to the right, as if to say “That one there! With the five-o-clock shadow! Get him!”

OODLES OF UGLY, DISTRACTING ADVERTISING LINKS: Check! Take that, Atlas Shrugs — no more store-brand cheese puffs for Fudgehammer!

SCADS OF IMPENETRABLE BANNERS, LINKS, NEWSFEEDS, MADE-UP AWARDS, AND DOOFY WIDGETS THAT MAKE NAVIGATING THE SITE NEXT TO IMPOSSIBLE EVEN IF YOU WERE TO WISH TO DO SUCH A THING: Check! Among other things, at this site, you can map jihad (hint: a lot of it is in the Middle East!), look at a guy with a crescent moon on his cufflinks stabbing the Bible, discover that ISLAMSFORLOSERS is a top commenter, take a poll about whether or not the Democrats are pawns of “the Muslim Lobby in Washington” (hint: yes!), and join a group advocating regime change in Iran, which is sadly still necessary even after all of Michael Ledeen’s crackerjack reporting.

BIG GRAPHIC OF A TEMPLAR, JUST AS IF THE CRUSADES WERE SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF: Check, check, and double-check!

Unfortunately, once we get past the compulsories, there’s not a lot of verve in the actual performance. The blog entries themselves are a dull lot, consisting of nothing you haven’t heard before when Debbie Schlussel forgets to take her teeth out. Although there are a few fun entries (like the one where he approvingly quotes the guy who assassinated Gandhi and the one where he fawns over the burning in effigy of a dead man and pops a mini-boner while contemplating the possibility of an invasion by phantom Vikings), is mostly just boilerplate all-Muslims-are-evil…

EDIT: At this point I had to make a slight correction. Seems my brain was over-fried from fixing the site crash when I launched into this. Leonard tried to do a quick end around with an edit and left a comment informing me of my “mistake”, but in actuality, I clearly remembered the posting being labled “Posted by Gavin M.” when it was originally up, so I suppose Leonard and Gavin share the same computer, perhaps the same bed, and it was actually Leonard that goofed. Oops. Look at that Lenny, I turned it right around on you again. And I can prove I’m right because smartguy Leonard didn’t clean his rabbit trail well enough. (See the comments that follow this article.) End of Edit

There’s also another inmate, I mean blogger at that same site named Gavin.

Gavin, Gavin. Why does that name sound so damn familiar.

Oh, yes, now I remember: Gavin King — moonbat journalist. Yet another odd coincidence.

Moral of this story? Ladies, don’t name your sons Gavin.

Seems old Gavin M. fancies himself a liberal-progressive (I always laugh when I read that contradiction) and a musician. Oh, the irony there.

The Sadly, No! blog is based in Germany. Why don’t some of you gentle readers go pay Leonard and Gavin a visit and spread the love?:

I Wanna Be Your Fudgehammer

It’s past midnight. I’m going to go wind down, but I’ll “deal” with these muffin-headed kids tomorrow. You know I will.

Hell, I’ve already immortalized them in my Moonbat links. Nobody can ever accuse me of fearing dissent. In fact, anyone that has followed my comments from Jihad Watch all these years is probably giggling in anticipation of the sh**storm right now.

The flaming will begin on the morrow. Bring your marshmallows.

Addendum: Well, it looks like morning came early — I couldn’t resist the argument and began before bedtime. Did I done good? Did I, did I? (Warning: I did use some blue language once or twice. I’m not a sailor though, I swear.)

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